I've been crying on and off about this. I've spoken to my mom about it of course but I don't like to worry or stress her, and everyone else...forget them. I don't think it's weird to write about it here and writing about it will...maybe help me to feel better. Anyway, this is for all the girls out there, so guys you've been warned.
I noticed it before my last period, so over a month ago, when I was showering: that I had a small lump in my left breast. I really noticed it when it stuck around after my period was long gone. It's been there. And before we jump to the worst possible conclusion, no, it's most likely not cancer. My wound specialist - for my pilonidal incision - checked it for me because his focus was breast problems before he became a wound specialist, I believe. Or something like that. He said it feels like a cyst or fibroadenoma, and that I should go for a sonogram once my next period is clear and gone. He said two weeks after my period would be best. That'll be three-ish weeks from now.
Tomorrow I go to my gynecologist to have her check as well.
My wound specialist says the best thing would be to have it surgically removed. I'm sure people have different experiences and feelings on that - that's fine - but I will say that he's been the best doctor I've ever had, and helped me to finally get past my recurrent pilonidal cyst, so I take his opinion strongly. But after three surgeries, it makes me feel so down to think I might need another, as small as it might be.
It would only be local anesthesia. The lump is near the surface so it seems to be the best possible case - the easiest to remove. The quickest to heal. One week, most likely. But I keep asking myself why is there always one problem after another? And this one in particular bothers me. Because it's likely hormone-related and my hormones have been a problem, and I'm on the pill. Estrogen, estrogen, estrogen.
I don't like to touch that area too long when rinsing off in the shower. I don't like to think about that lump poking out when I'm laying on my side, my left arm propping my body up and, as such, stretching the left side of my breast area. I don't like any of it.
I know it can be worse. I know I have no right to whine when there are women that go through horrible things - things that may even make my small lump look like a blessing. I'm so sorry for those that fit that description...I really am. =/
But it bothers me. A lot. I guess that's all. There's nothing else to say.
Do share your experiences below if you've ever gone through this kind of thing.
~nikki
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